First, I have to ask. Is anyone else so excited at the idea of Juaquin Phoenix as Johnny Cash? Is it just me? I love my husband. Really I do. But I have a few celebrity/movie/TV crushes. One is spiderman. Not Toby Maguire, but spiderman. Like if actual spiderman came and wanted to ask me out, could Chris really argue with him? I mean he's FREAKING SPIDERMAN. Well anyway - my point is that Juaquin Phoenix as Johnny Cash is my new movie boyfriend. Though I do like Johnny Cash's music, neither he nor Juaquim Phoenix are appealing to me individually, but the combination is intriguing. Oh, and I love Reese Witherspoon. I am so seeing this movie.

Anyway - enough about that.

So I had an alternate costume for work today. I was "Super Jen."

Chris made the logo for me and I ironed it onto a shirt. I also had a cape and a tiara.

We had a work party and everyone dressed up. I'm in a sugar coma. Here is a list of what I ate today. This is not for the faint of heart:

• Nutragrain waffles (normal) and coffee (normal)
• Sugar cookie
• Tomato soup and slice of pizza (Worse lunch than usual)
• Brownie (I made them with a small snickers bar inside.)
• Mini Payday Candy Bar
• Cut apples with caramel
• Cider
• Mallowmar
• chips
• Dinner - Potato florentine soup and bacon and spinach quiche
• "Inside Out" Reeses Peanut butter cup
• Another mini brownie

I should effectively weigh 300 lbs right now. Seriously. How did I consume so much junk in one day and why am I sharing it with the internet? Because I hope my shame will shock me into eating normally until Thanksgiving where I will consume my weight in Turkey and gravy.

Whew. I need another mini chocolate bar.

Posted by jen at 09:20 PM |Comments (14)

By the time you read this, it'll probably be actual Halloween, so HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

We were luckily invited to a halloween party at our friend Josh and Jaime's house on Saturday. Everyone dressed up and it was fan-tas-tic to see everyone in costume!

I decided to base my costume on the ridiculous amount of "sexy cop," "sexy nurse," and even "sexy convict" costumes I've seen. At first I was going to be a "sexy janitor" but then I saw this costume at the halloween store:

And I decided to be "Sexy Virgin Mary."

A little cutting, sewing, and fishnet stokings and I was there. I got very mixed reactions to this costume. Most people thought I was sexy religious something but I don't think they got the humor. They probably just thought I bought some sexy nun costume, but I thought I was hilarious. I even offended a few people. I think I will be able to reuse it and be "Sexy lady of Guadalupe" next year.

Unlike my "thinking man's sexy costume," Chris went straight for the laughs.

Meet my husband - the tooth fairy. He won (well tied) for funniest costume at the party! He won a farting machine! My husband has a farting machine.

I thought I took more pictures, but I guess I was imagining things. But I did get a picture of Mark as Hansel (Heather was dressed as Gretel, but I guess I didn't get a picture) and Josh as Moe. I thought Mark's costume was awesome. Next time he needs to wear sausages around his next.

Here's Julie and Phil. Phil was a magnet and Julie was rainbow bright.

There wer other good costumes including two men dressed up like beer bottles, our frien Jen as a tourist and our friend Rudy as Chris Farrely, a couple of devils, a woman dressed up as the bride of frankenstein in her actual wedding dress, and the usual amusing cross dressing. All in all, a good party with lots of costumes.

I'm excited about tomorrow being actual Halloween. I love handing out candy and seeing the costumes.

Happy Halloween!

Posted by jen at 08:04 PM |Comments (10)

Oh yes. I truly do love America's Next Top Model. I usually miss it during it's regular run and then catch some marathon on VH1 or another network. Tonight's episode was especially good with this line uttered "Oh yeah? What are you then? Alcoholic Bitch." Oh yes. They are mad because they are hungry.

That said, I was also very happy with tonight's Fresh New Episode of the Gillmore Girls. Oh this season is so good. I am not ashamed of my slavery to the boob tube. Say it loud, say it proud. I love television.

But apparently I also love me some knitting. Here you can see my progress on the multidirectional scarf, and that I purchased the Scarf Styles book, a pamphlet on magic loop knitting (hey I have to knit those socks that rock socks!) and some Knit Picks lace weight yarn to make the Flower Basket Shawl. That's right folks, I'm hopping right on that bandwagon. Hopefully this time the lace won't conquer me.

I tried a new gym for yoga class tonight and my teacher looked just like this:

And he gave a 3 minute lecture at the beginning of class that I zoned out on. Good thing I know that I like two other teachers at this gym because one class with David Cross is enough to turn me away. Oh and a lady farted in class. But everyone was nice and ignored it. I tried to act like I didn't notice because I thought I'd be so embarassed if it was me or even someone I knew and I'd want everyone to ignore it. So we all ignored it. And all was well. But I'm still not going back to this particular class.

Posted by jen at 11:33 PM |Comments (8)

So are you wondering what I bought at Rhinebeck? Yes I realize it was over a week ago, but sometimes I move at a snail's pace.

So there is the Brooksfarm.

Fourplay, 50% Wool 50% Silk. 270 yards. Colorway - Amber(?)

Primero, 100% Kid Mohair, 500 yards. Colorway - royal plush (?)

Blue Moon Fiber Arts:

Socks that Rock, Superwash Merino, 325 yards, Brick and Socks that Rock, Superwash Merino, 325 yards, Two Can Rock

Blue Ridge yarns, Handpainted Mohair Boucle, 540 Yards, Golden Harvest.

A woman I work with was kind enough to bring in her swift and ball winder for me. And this happened:

So exciting! Guess what, I ordered a swift and ballwinder last night. I'm hooked. I can't buy yarn fast enough to wind it and knit. Wacky.

I also started a multidirectional scarf with the Brooksfarm Fourplay. At first, the pattern perplexed me, but it seems to be working out now! Yay yarn!

Continue reading "A Day Late - The Loot"

Posted by jen at 08:22 PM |Comments (7)

There's been a lot of drama around me the last week or so. There was the drama (the good kind) of meeting the fabulous bloggers at Rhinebeck. But there's been some drama (the bad kind) in the lives of those around me. It's been an eventful week. I feel like there's something weird going on in the atmosphere...

So this morning when I woke up and looked around and saw that my black thumb of death has claimed another plant's life, I was not surprised. When I got to work I instant messaged Chris.

Me: Did you notice that my black thumb of death claimed another life?
Chris: No.
Chris: Did you notice that the spider's dead?

Okay let me clarify for those that don't know. I have a pet tarantula. It's kind of a dumb pet really. I mean it's cool and has the "ick" factor and is kind of nice and nerdy to have. But all in all the only interaction I have with it is going to Petsmart once every 2 weeks to buy crickets to feed her. I didn't really think that she made that much of an impact on me. But I was freaked out by the news of her apparent death. I mean I teared up a little. I shouted to my coworkers around me "Holy crap my spider DIED!!"

I had to get more information out of Chris. His story was that this morning she was lying on her back in her cage, which she never does. So he thought she was dead. He blew on her to check (this is the closest we come to touching her) and she moved...a tiny bit. But ultimately looked like she was on the brink of death. She was Macauley Kulkin versus a bee hive in my girl, you know?

This was upsetting, so I did what anyone would naturally do.

I googled "Tarantula lying on back."

I found out. Lo and behold.

She might not be dead.

I found out that when spiders die they curl up their legs underneath them, they don't roll on their back; legs up a la Wile E. Kyote. According to the great knowledge base of the internet she was molting. In other words, she had outgrown her current skin and was getting ready to shed it and reveal a new one.

So I read up and realized that there were crickets in her cage (last night's dinner) and that they could hurt her in her fragile state of molting. So I ran home.

That's right. I took off. Left work. Tarantula emergency people, I have to go. The whole way home in my head I sang "I need a hero...Holdin' out for a hero til the end of the night..."

I found her on her back just like Chris said:

Long story short (too late), I got the crickets out using a patented paper cup/piece of paper method and misted her substrate with water like the internet said to and went back to work feeling triumphant.

When I got home tonight I looked in her cage and it looked like there were TWO SPIDERS. That's what her shed skin looked like. Here it is:

Doesn't it look just like her?

This is gross but I'm saving it for Chris' boss's kid who would think this was the coolest thing EVER.

Crisis averted.

Posted by jen at 09:25 PM |Comments (18)

Oh. My. God. So much fun at Rhinebeck! Yay!

My friend Kate drove up to Poughkeepsie NY with me after work on Friday in the rain and nastyness. It took us about four hours to get up there to her grandmothers house. We slept over and then on Saturday I got up to leave and meet Anne Marie, Carrie, Jessica, and Casey at Le International House de Pancakes in Poughkeepsie. I was sooo excited! These peeps are the bomb yo. Really, everyone I met was as funny, and nice, and lovely as I expected and I had a fab time!

You can check out my pictures here. I think Anne Marie, Carrie, and Jess will probably have some pics up soon too. So basically we went to the festival, then AM and Carrie had a jacuzzi, then we went to the grocery store and quiznos and then we sat around and knit and drank beer with Vibegirl Lara, Small hands Chelsea, Snargle Sarah (is it me or is your site down??), Paula and Anna. I am so sorry Paula and Anna if I screwed up your names. There was also someone else in the room with us and I never got her name. I suck. I am so sorry. If I met you this weekend. Please tell me who you are and I will faithfully read your blog!!!

So anyway - these are my new BFFs and I am so happy I met all of you and I had a fantastic time and I have many funny stories now.

Things I found out about these peeps:

• Carrie can be a little punchy in the car and may mistake one Starbucks for two different Starbucks, but that is okay because she is cute and funny.
• Anne Marie will think you are short until she meets you. She is as skinny and pretty in person as on her blog pictures.
• The way to a woman's heart is through her ass according to someone Anne Marie knows
• Jessica is very very good at packing a ton of shit into a tiny car
• Casey is a big fan of sauces and mustards
• You pronounce Lara's name with a short a in the beginning
• If you only barely know Chelsea and Sarah, they will still be very nice and friendly to you
• More knitters than you think know the words to this song.

So as you can see, this was a very educational experience and well worth the drive through the rain to get to meet these wonderful people. Yay!

Posted by jen at 10:30 AM |Comments (11)

I gots my hairs did. I've been so excited about cutting my hair now that the wedding is over. I also have been wanting to get red streaks in it for a while. My hairdresser is a Genius! GENIUS I SAY! She would put Johnathan in his place...

I loves it!

And another angle...

It's a shaggy bob and it took out a lot of the bulk of my hair and made it liveable. Isn't there something alluring about the hair salon? Whenever I go I think for a while - maybe I should just quit my job and work at a salon. The women always seem to be having a god time.

So big weekend coming up - Rhinebeck Sheep and Wool! And I'm trying to finish an unhappy little novelty yarn scarf that Chris has informed me looks like succotash because it's green and yellow. Oh and I don't like lima beans. I just don't have time to finish anything substantial...

Eh, it's a drop stitch novelty scarf! What do you want from me?

Posted by jen at 09:39 PM |Comments (12)

Here's a post of random facts a la Stacy...

The following searches have led people to my blog:

• picturs of people pooping


• How to get albacore tuna smells out of clothes


• Whoorish makeup


• Getting pregnant after diagnosed with meningitis


• Malaryia symptoms


• Big Beautiful Bosoms


• Pictures of Zoey Dechanel naked


• Dope Pope Soap on a Rope


• Chicken Tikki Masala

The albacore tuna one is the one that really gets me.

My favorite tv shows right now are House and the Gillmore Girls. Did you catch the Gilmore Girls seasons one and two on sale at Target? Cause I did sucka! Oh yes $18.88 each.

Movies out that I want to see right now are: In Her Shoes, Serenity, and Thumbsucker (yeah my movie taste is getting a little more generic with age.)

My favorite food right now is toast with peanutbutter and lower-sugar peaches and cream quaker oatmeal oh, and lowfat string cheese.

I am most looking forward to Halloween, My Birthday (11/26), Thanksgiving, and Christmas right now. As well as painting my livingroom wall, getting my hairs cut tomorrow and my next pilates class.

Posted by jen at 04:29 PM |Comments (3)

What's got two thumbs and is (so far, if things work out) going to Rhinebeck?

John Kerry?

Mr. Monkey?

No silly! This girl right here!!

This has been a fun weekend of us going out and eating too much dinner. We had dinner with Kate and Alex on Friday and Adam and Andrea on Saturday. We always have fun with both those couples and we wish we all lived closer together. See on the east coast, 45 minutes is far away in our perspective. I know in places like California 45 minutes is nothing...I guess we're spoiled. Today was football watching (so sad the Eagles got their asses handed to them) and haning out with JT.

By the way, Chris and I made the smooth move of both wearing Metrostars t-shirts all day without realizing we matched. Good thing JT was here to point it out to us.

Posted by jen at 08:38 PM |Comments (5)

The big lug wants to go on tour folks. Through this blog I have met so many cool people! I would love to meet you all. I do have a little bit of a fear that outside of this blog I am incredibly boring in person. (A fear that could be remedied by alcohol - a little Social Medicne, as Sebadoh would say).

Anyway - here would be the stops on my tour:

MN - visit PlanetDan, Stacy, Hotbabe, Kiddo, and all other MN bloggers.

GA- visit KnitAMKnit, Carrie, HEJ, and the other cool GA bloggers

CA - visit Stacey, Elizabeth, and anyother bloggers in the area that would want to meet little old me.

Oh there would definitely be stops added. For now I'm just trying to tag along on other people's bloggy meetings! I have invited myself on Hotbabe's trip to meet Diblasic. I have also been scheming to go to Rhinebeck and meet these lovely ladies if possible.

Anyway - who knows what will shake out? I'd like to meet all of you is my basic point. And if my dear husband won't be mad at me for running all around the country to meet perfect strangers, then maybe I will someday.

So in the knitting world, I'm working on this bolero from Interweave Knits:

It's knit on tiny size 5 and size 3 needles and is going fine so far, but I will definitely need help picking up stitches for the edging!

This weekend should be fun filled with a trip tonight to visit the recently engaged K & A! I'm so excited for their wedding...Then tomorrow we're having dinner with more friends and of course there is always the Farm on Sunday. Hooray.

Happy Friday Blogosphere!

Posted by jen at 09:36 AM |Comments (7)

Inspired by Hotbabe (who was inspired by me) I scanned in my prom pics last night. I have added black bars to disguise people because I feel bad posting their picture without their permission.

Here's me at my then-boyfriend's senior prom. He was one year older than me, so I got to go when I was a junior. This is me and my friend Megan. Whom I haven't seen too much of since high school. I am not a fan of either my dress or my hair in this picture. Not sure what's going on. My aunt made the dress and I picked out the pattern. Looking back - it's a little weird.

And here's me and two of my girlfriends at my senior prom. I loved my hair and my dress this year. I went with the same boyfriend. We went out for a looooong time. This prom we went with two other couples in a winebago. Very funny. I don't remember very much of the prom, except that they played some cheesey music, people got to smoke cigarettes with the teachers because we were old enough not to get in trouble. And then we spent the night at one of the girl's houses in the picture and she lived on top of a funeral home. Very cool.

And this one is just to embarass myself (and my sister - sorry Deb...)

Posted by jen at 11:42 PM |Comments (13)

Now my love of reading can be proven to guests by a public display of books! Yay! (Perhaps Posh should get some bookshelves?) My books have been in boxes since we moved in March because we got rid of our old decrepit bookshelves in hopes of buying these nice new Pottery Barn ones. So we finally got them:

And now my books (well most of them)can be proudly displayed. I left some books off like "Football for Dummies" and "How to be debt free by 30."

I have a real sentimental connection to a lot of books and used to keep every book I read as some sort of record that I read it. I can read a book and then completely forget about it months later. Now I tend to try and donate them or give them to other people to read because I'm not sure that it's wise to hang onto a book you'll never read again. But it made me really happy to see these books go up on bookshelves. There's old poetry books that I've had since college and the first copy of "On the Road" that I bought and read and thought made me cool to read even if I secretly thought it was super boring.

On the knitting front - I went back to my knitting group last week. Since I've been gone there has been an almost complete turnover in attendees. There are a few of the same girls left but mostly new people that I hadn't met. The group seems really cool and chatty now! (Not that it wasn't before...) I cast on for the gauntlets in last Fall's Knit.1.

I've made little progress so far. I don't particularly like this pattern or yarn. But now that I've invested time into them I guess I should finish them.

As far as de-fat-ass-ifying* myself, I went to yoga on Saturday and will go back to pilates or yoga again this week and I'm back on the weight watchers bandwagon as well. I have this real huge fear of gaining weight now that I'm married. I guess that's a little ridiculous. But I'm afraid it's like some unavoidable fact of nature. Marriage=Can't fit in pants. Damn.

*I know I'm not really a fat ass, and I'm not fishing for compliments...I just like to make fun of myself...

Posted by jen at 08:28 AM |Comments (7)